Diagnosis

Yes.
My family had spent RM 2K to fetch my grandpa back all the way from SP (not sunway piramid, duh, its Sungai Petani)
In case ur geography is THAT bad...Sungai Petani is actually in Kedah...

So, we rented an Ambulans, brought him back...
Sent him to Hosp Sungai Buloh (very good and new Hosp)
And we brought grey hairs to quite a num of doctors....
Lolz.
No one found anything....
Everything is normal.
Even the BP is Text Book figure 120/80 (i wonder how he acheived that)

Now, the diagnosis is out...
finally...
A female doctor found it (a tick to Female!! hehe)
A bad prognosis esp with his old age.....extreme old age if u want me to specify.

-Sigh-


I must blame myself
Why i had not suspected anything?
When he aren't able to eat..
When he vomited.
All these are signs
They are so clear
Right infront of my eyes
Using CCB words,
They are crying :" pick me pick me, i am the correct diagnosis"
Esp with pain when i palpate his stomach
Yet i did not picked them up

I am such an asshole
I am such a failure

I need to learn....

Nothing can be done now...
Except to wait...
for a funeral to proceed.

I Am sorry....
If i ever said i hate you
I am sorry
If i ever treated u badly
I am sorry
Sincerely sorry
A late sorry
I know,

Somehow, all the hatred cancels off each other.
I have no idea why..
and Is too tired to think why...

I think im going to bed
Bed is the only place where i feel happiness surrounding me
In my dream
I am what i want to be
I am what i think i must be
I am Happy to the very least

p/s: No, im fine, please do not start calling me. I am fine. Sometimes, i just want to be alone...let me think of all my sins.....let me be all by myself.