Don't Worry, Be Happy !!

Dear All,

Hmm, to start with everything, i shall give a warning: This is going to be a superb long (i wish la..who knows?), so if you do not have time, just ignore me. Nothing important.....

A recap of my whole week......all i can say is : Horrible & Terrible !!

I broke down twice this week, cry as hard as possible, till i start to understand why people say " nuu ren is shui zhuo de" (women are made from water). Haha.

Sunday: Went to cut my hair.....make it REAL short now. Oh, not to say my mum made me geram by FFK me.....forever making me angry la her !! [haha]

Monday: Nothing much important.

Tuesday: I had PBL at 8.30, woke up at 6.30 since i need to get out from home before 7am...then went out for lunch and come back for meeting at 12.30 which stretch up to 2pm......then went library for one whole stretch day of study...till i also head pusing pusing. Then went lecture....and went home feeling so dizzy...yet i HAVE to study...since i WANT to go shopping the next day. But but...my mum, didn't know i was so tired, keep asking me to do this do that...just because she is LAZY eg: eh, go take the oil for ur uncle at downstairs or eh, you go down, see ah tut sleep where then on the fan for him or eh, you go fetch this for me downstairs. One time 2 time, never mind...i helped you...but when you over-expect my kindness, you will get the consequence...which i shouted and scolded my mum. Since then, she never asked me to fetch anything for her. haha.

Wednesday: Woke up at 6am, because i want to go buy McD as breakfast, for me and the 2 guys. Was feeling very tired, nauseated, headache, but i promised them, so have to go. Was served by an extremely rude and bad face waiter whom said loudly " siapa puk tak nak serve, mengapa nak saya serve pulak". Apparently she wasn't talking to me...but shouting across to her friends...and since she was SHOUTING, i heard and felt so angry. And, she put everything in the bag.......then leave on the counter...make me so stupid stand at the counter as though she still have stuffs to put. After sometime only i realized she finish packing. -duh-

So, i went to uni, and call chen yi to wake her up then dropped by the nasi lemak stall to buy my family's LUNCH. -aih- EVERYONE just LIKE to call me do things for them. Anyhow, the nasi lemak kuah somehow dirties my pouch and pencil box...and i have to wash it at home after my lecture. Then after lunch, my family and I went Sunway Piramid for shopping. Everything was going well, although i was extremely tired and in need of sleep, not to say feeling extremely guilty for i haven't finish Air Topic, Narrative (both of them deadline at next thursday), study my MSK notes and revision.

At night, after dinner, i jump up to my room and wanted to study, then i realize my pencil case is not dry yet and i asked my mum where she put my other BUNDLE of pencil cases (yea, i had a bundle of them, just that my mum kept them somewhere). Mana tahu, my mum told me " i forget where i put wor, you go find la...or else you use this [chuck me a super dirty, aunty, and hideos pouch] and say " same de la...use 1st la, tahan a day or 2 " then she went and place her big ass on the sofa and start chit chatting with my aunt about some one's gossip. WTH!! I was so angry......i kicked everything i can kicked (to not spoil them) then after my leg pain, i slap, push, hit anything i can do..........then hand pain, i start banging the doors which turn out not to be a good idea since i shut the door on my fingers [ouch].....and end up....i don't know is the pain or the anger or the tiredness.....i just sit in the middle of my bed...kneeling summore, and start cry as hard as possible as though i never cried before. I ignored Ah Yun's sms [ im sorry, yunny ]...just kept crying.......and forced myself to study Thani's note although im crying. But all i did was to cry and cry...and trying to putuskan my highlighter. Haha. So, that night, ended with no notes being studied. SIGH!!!

Oh, i wrote to my aunt too....lolz, telling her how badly my mum treated me...lolz.....and the funny thing i saw now is.......i write and cry at the same time. So, my keyboard was soaking with tears after i finish the email [lucky my lappie didn't go haywire !! lolz]

Thursday: Woke up with puffy eyes due to the excessive "water" production previous night. haha. Headache and dizzy, but still went to Uni for 8am class. While on the road, someone BANG me AGAIN. Yes.....i never bang ppl, but ppl just LOVE to bang me. about 3-4 weeks ago, KKB-IMU buss bang me...and now some college guy bang me pulak. I saw my bonnet crack from my side mirror and i wind my window down to signal that guy to drive to the side so we don't block the traffice and cause an even bad jam. But, that guy...................didn't do so but drive on. Lucky there was this jam that he cannot move much. So, i did the bravest thing in my whole life. I came out from my car.....walk to his car....and knocked at his window...as though that is not a main road with loads of car and motocycles....and as though i was in a shopping mall car park [hahahahaha]. So i start settling with that guy......{don't want tell the details}, but the settling didn't turn out good cuz he kept making me angry...and i kept talking in an harsh and cold voice as though im "po4 fu4 ma4 jie1" (angry women scolding road?). Haha. AND...the thing that make me most angry is.....he drives off when the car starts to move and leave me in the MIDDLE of the road. WAH LIAO EH!!! I was so angry that i went back to my car....called my mum....and got even angrier when she didn't pick up.....so i called and called and keep calling till my mum pick up the phone and i screamed at her. Lolz. Damn angry + messy la me.

So, end up, i went to uni, late for THani's class...lucky didn't miss much...and went home after 2 hour lecture to see what my mum want to do. End up, my mum wants to go lunch in SS15 and see whether we can catch that guy in that area (college area mah). And.....really, luck was on my side.....the only space available for me to park my car so i can have lunch, is actually RIGHT INFRONT of that guy's car. Haha. Thanx to my uncle and aunt, who are Toto+ Magnum + Sport Horse + 4D king & Queen, they can remember any 4 figure number PLUS recognise them whenever they see them. Haha. So, mum stuck a note on that guy's windscreen to tell him to meet at THAT spot at 6pm...or i would go report police and have his P licence gantung. Muahaha. [according to CCB, this sounded like loan shark...lol]

So, after that, i WENT back to IMU again...lolz, for CSU. It was a very funny session, but i wasn't in mood to laugh that time [laugh like hell when i remember that today] just worry, tired, and no semangat. So, after CSU, i went home to find no one at home...i use a cane to wack my dog cuz he very naughty [ damn bad of me hor?] and then lie on sofa and tears immediately trickle down my cheeks. -sigh- I was so tired that i do not want to go police station since report take loads of time and i NEED sleep and study. So i cried...and at the same time...sms CCB. SMS halfway...i fall asleep pulak [sorry la, brother]. He was very nice and make me feel so touched. Lolz.

Anyhow, the whole thing settle pretty nicely....but my mum still don't want let me go.....she asked me to bring my whole family to Carefour (T.T) [hahahahahahahaha] So, li li la la...dee dee dah dah....do everything, came home also 12am. AIH !!!!!! =.=" So went to bed straight. Haha

p.s: oh, thanx to CCB, i relize that i should pull myself together...and not continue to sulk and sad.....always think i need to study, think i need to sleep...which all of that make me more tired and irritable. So, i pulled myself up and smiled !!

p.s 2: I missed the MidAutumn Celebration and Welcoming Party which ALL committee MUST attend. What to do, not i want to have accident de ah...ppl want bang me...i can't even avoid. For the 3rd time in IMU, i missed the celebration. haha. Really have no fate with it.

Friday: Woke up with a full energy due to the 9hr sleep i had. Had an early lecture this morning, so went to Uni. -Sigh-Went to check email after lecture cuz i know, my aunt would have write back to me yesterday [but thanx to my mum, i didn't even have the energy to check mail]. After i read the whole email....i start crying again. [lolz] Yup, in e-lab, a very common place where anyone can come and go......tears trickle down my cheeks. I was so touched with her advice and comfort. Will say nothing about it.....but i shall always bring it out to read when i am stress.

So, after lunch, CCB sent chen yi home and we SUPPOSED to go library together....BUT BUT....it was as though fated for me.......i avoided Adelin successfully at the door of IMU, yet i met another yoga club committee when i go toilet. AIH !!! Fated la. So, i packed little bit of my stuff...and decided to go support the club which i once was a committee.

All i can say is " IT IS GOOD & ACCURATE ". Haha. Why ? Cuz they have this meditation thing....where you put right hand on heart 1st...then put on top of your head....and then change hand put on top of head. So, if you feel and warmness in your hand, it has diff meaning. For me....i told her i feel hot on my left hand. She asked me " are you worried lately? very worried? Of many many things?" OMG!!! She was so accurate. I was worried hell. Haha. And, one thing she said....hit me in my mind " Forgive yourself and forgive others. We are humans, we make mistakes, don't think so much, do your best and the rest just leave it all to divine. If someone continue to hurt you, never mind, try forgive her again and again, and help her again and again, somehow, later she will leave you alone and never kacau u again. If you are angry, you are suffering yourself while that person is so happy. So FORGIVE and you will have good fruits eventually!!" I damn like this phrase. Haha.

I had "good fruits".....haha. I went to Friday Focus (aka pathology case discussion for all semester) and don't know why, my mind was working real good, i got one case correct and Dr. Thani said " i will give her an A if she is now in exams". WAH!!! I was so happy !!! [ sorry la, SS a bit, cuz very rare got ppl puji me de leh...haha]

Then lecture....and now....everything was FINE.....

I can't tell you how glad i am now, to find everything as good as i want it to be. I don't know its because i had been stress that i see everything as sad stuff........and now cuz i put all that down and decided to follow my own steps, so i feel good? Or was it cuz of that yoga thing that i learn how to meditate and it calms me down?? [yoga always de-stress me no matter what, Summative la, EOS la...when im stress...i go yoga and all would be fine again]Oh well, which ever.....all i want to say....im feeling good now. Haha.

Special thanx to CCB, for the concern, advice and comfort during my "down" days !!

About my title...this was one of the advice my aunt gave me.....

and to everyone who is feeling stress now

" Don't Worry......relax.....and Be Happy....tmr sun will shine brightly again !! "